Age and forms of address
In Korea, asking your age is less an intrusion than a step in setting the relationship.
Why age comes up
Korean changes its speech level (formal or casual) and forms of address depending on the other person. Hence the custom of establishing age or start date on first meeting. If it makes you uncomfortable, you can say "저는 존댓말이 편해요" (I'm comfortable with polite speech).
Common forms of address
- ○○ 씨 — the safest all-purpose form, after a name.
- ○○ 님 — more polite; common online and in services.
- 선배 / 후배 — those who joined a school or workplace before or after you.
- 사장님, 팀장님, 과장님 — where there is a title, use the title.
- 선생님 — not only for teachers; also used to convey respect.
- 아저씨 / 아주머니 — for middle-aged strangers, but it can come across badly, so use with care.
A safe approach
- When unsure, use "○○ 씨" or the person's title.
- Always start with polite speech.
- Even if told "you can speak casually", you needn't switch straight away.
- Using a bare given name stays sensitive even after you become friendly.
- At work, follow your company's convention — many now use "님" for everyone.
Questions people ask
I don't want to give my age. Something like "we seem to be about the same age" is fine. You're under no obligation to answer.
Is Korean age different from international age? Official documents and administration use international age. Everyday conversation sometimes differs, so check as needed.
Someone used casual speech with me and it felt rude. It may be meant as friendliness, but if it bothers you, say so politely. Persistently dismissive behaviour may be discrimination.
What should I call people at work? Title + 님 is safest. If unsure, ask a colleague.
Take care
Questions about age, marriage and plans for children are commonplace, but you don't have to answer. That said, questions unrelated to the job at a recruitment interview can be inappropriate. See job-interview-korea.
Related
korean-etiquette · drinking-culture · gift-culture · job-interview-korea · restaurant-etiquette
Source
Ministry of Gender Equality and Family, Danuri portal www.liveinkorea.kr / As of 2026-08